Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Maxine for President

Someone sent this to me and I think it's hilarious! Maxine is the old lady on the Hallmark cards. Enjoy!

Maxine for President

Everyone concentrates on the problems we're having in this country lately: illegal immigration, hurricane recovery, alligators attacking people in Florida .

Not me. I concentrate on solutions for the problems. It's a win-win situation.

+ Dig a moat the length of the Mexican border.
+ Send the dirt to New Orleans to raise the level of the levies.
+ Put the Florida alligators in the moat along the Mexican border.

Any other problems you would like for me to solve today ? Yes!

Think about this one:

1. Cows
2..The Constitution
3. The Ten Commandments


C O W S

Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give each of them a cow.

T H E C O N S T I T U T I O N

They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq .... Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years, and we're not using it anymore.

T H E 1 0 C O M M A N D M E N T S

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this: You cannot post 'Thou Shalt Not Steal,' 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery,' and 'Thou Shall Not Lie' in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians..It creates a hostile work environment.

7 comments:

the Mah said...

That is great! I want to be a Maxine.

the Mah said...

Oh my heck, I just realized your Like List is alphabetized!
Oh course!
You are so clever, I don't know how to do those. Alphabetized or not.

Jamie said...

Thanks for a good laugh.

Katy said...

She's got my vote.

Katy said...

Dude! My rolls made the "Like" list! I'll bring you some, you sweet thang, you.

Erin said...

Hey Mah! On my blog set up I clicked on "Add a page element" and it brought up a smaller window with a bunch of choices. Making a list was one of them and it gave the option to alphabetize. I would LOVE to see a list of your likes and dislikes!!

Erin said...

Katy - you're going to bring me your yummy, yummy rolls b/c it made my "likes" list?!? Let's see...I think I'll add the artichoke dip, tortilla soup, guacamole, chowder soup you made us when we moved into our house, and every dessert you've ever made. There.....now that DOES mean you'll bring me all of those, too, right?